Pluto is the planet of passion, power and control, and has depth and intensity. This can go to extremes, and can become obsession, rage, and make it difficult to see the forest from the trees. When Pluto is healthy, we're passionate, focused on our purpose, and have strong wills to get through anything.
In love, Pluto brings the intensity and passion, the depth and power, but also sometimes the unhealthy obsession and rage.
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Pluto, Transits, & Love Astrology
Pluto can help you to come together with someone in a strong, intense connection under positive Pluto aspects (sextiles and trines) to the natal or progressed 5th or 7th house cusps or rulers, or natal Venus, and this can be handled with greater ease. Intimacy can feel easier, and you can explore new depths together. You can take the connection seriously, and feel more devoted.
The 5th house governs love, while the 7th house governs relationships and commitment. Venus is the planet of love and relationships, so that's why these positions are in play.
Transit Pluto in the 5th house can make you take love more seriously, and you won't settle for anything superficial; transit Pluto in the 7th house can make you take commitment more seriously, and you can give your all in relationships; and transit Pluto in the 8th house brings Pluto home, helping you feel more intimate and open.
Hard Pluto aspects (conjunctions, squares, and oppositions) can bring out obsessive energy, and you can become quite enthralled with someone, or attract someone enthralled with you. This can bring out intense connections, and sometimes this is very unhealthy or even dangerous.
Pluto is the stalker, the jealous ex, the abusive spouse when not manifesting properly. It can be difficult to let go, and you can latch on irrationally to someone that you shouldn't, or experience someone latching on to you that you want to get away from but can't.
At its core, Pluto is the planet of transformation, and this is most apparent under hard aspects. This becomes crucial for you to navigate the difficult energy. A major transformation in your approach to love, sex, dating, and commitment, to what you give and take in your connections with others, to how and what you share, may need to be undertaken.
Any love and relationship issues need to be addressed, especially the heavier stuff relating to abuse and neglect. Pluto wants you to emerge from the cocoon a beautiful butterfly, but it'll be a jarring process in the meantime!
When you have a Pluto connection with someone in synastry, this can create a very intense connection between you. You can be quite passionate with one another, but this can also mean that you're more aggressive, fight over power and control, and bring out some of the darker sides of one another. The intense connection can help with commitment, but it needs to be healthy, otherwise it can turn toward the bad quickly.
To counter the intensity of Pluto, you usually need some positive Jupiter in the mix. Jupiter is optimistic, light, happy, and this can help to balance some of the intensity and seriousness of Pluto. Having positive Jupiter transits with Pluto can be a great indicator of a solid relationship that can stick around for a while, and not get sucked into the hard stuff.
But without Jupiter, Pluto can be very tricky to manage, especially hard Pluto. When that's the case, you may want to hide on an island!
Suggested Reading: Articles in the Love Astrology series: Mars & Love Astrology, Jupiter & Love Astrology, Saturn & Love Astrology, Uranus & Love Astrology, Neptune & Love Astrology, the 12th house, Chiron, eclipses, retrogrades, the Lunar Nodes, and the Asteroids of Your Name